Qiu Ling tried to ignore the way Fu Min was looking at him. Clearly, there was doubt written in his eyes. It made him a bit angry but he probably couldn’t complain. A lot of dragons were jealous. Maybe not of their own children but before their souls were bound, some would indeed be a bit unreasonable. That was probably also thanks to Tian’s curse.
He pushed the thought away and quietly shook his head. “No, I wouldn’t be. I … I do want children with him.” Indeed, if he could, he’d love to have more than one. But he also knew that that wouldn’t be possible. Bai Fen had already warned him about the personal curse Jing He’s family was under. Losing a child … that was a pain he wanted to subject neither Jing He nor himself to.
He sighed when that thought crossed his mind. Thankfully, they were both men. If they wanted a child, they could only do it the way Jinde and Leng Jin Yu had today. There was no risk of an accidental pregnancy.
Fu Min squatted next to him, nodding his head very appropriately. “I’m sure you can do it!”
Qiu Ling gave him another side-glance, feeling that he shouldn’t have come here. Fu Min wasn’t the right person to talk to about this. “Well, I have what I came for. I’ll come by again sometime.” Although by then, he felt like his secret stash of wine would be all but gone. This Fu Min would certainly sniff around now that he knew it was there and try to find all the jars.
Mn, really vexing. It seemed he could only start a new one in his new courtyard. But, then again, maybe this could be considered compensation for trading with him in the first place.
He got to his feet, looked around once more, and then headed out. He still didn’t go back to his new room though and instead went to knock on Xiang Yong’s door to waste some more time. He had no idea how long Jinde and Leng Jin Yu would need but it shouldn’t be short. This kind of couple that was over each other all the time would likely be glued to the bed once they got in there.
By the time he opened Xiang Yong’s door, Qiu Ling’s expression was bad, startling his adviser.
“Did something happen?” Xiang Yong immediately got to his feet, fearing for the worst.
Qiu Ling shook his head and went over, sitting down on the other side of his desk. “Jinde and Leng Jin Yu finally created that child of theirs.”
Xiang Yong slowly sat down again. “Oh. And Your Majesty is …”
Xiang Yong’s brows shot up at that. “Jealous?” He had expected a lot but not that. In fact, he had expected him to be somewhat uncomfortable with this child considering his own relationship with those two. But jealousy hadn’t entered the equation for him at any time. “Might I ask … why?”
Qiu Ling put down the jar of wine, his brows furrowing further. How to explain this? “Jinde was always like a parent to me and Leng Jin Yu … I can’t quite see him as my father but I know he has his memories and in a sense, he can’t extricate himself from that. It’s weird.”
“And that child will have a clear relationship.”
“Yes … although I don’t mind that.” Qiu Ling shook his head, feeling that he didn’t make much sense. “This child will be my sibling, in one way or another. I do see them like that. And … I am looking forward to the day they are born. It’s just that this has made me think.”
Xiang Yong had had no idea where this was going but seeing Qiu Ling’s gaze at this moment, it finally dawned on him. “This is about your own relationship with the Son of Heaven.”
“Mn.” Qiu Ling nodded, feeling that coming to Xiang Yong had indeed been the right choice. “Jing He and I … we’ve needed a long time to get to where we are. Before his trial started, it finally seemed like everything was on track. We were headed for marriage at least. I had the Heavenly Empress’s blessing and also Jing He’s word. There was only the matter with his father …”
The two of them shared a look, tacitly agreeing not to bring up how the Heavenly Emperor would have blown his top after being approached about this wedding.
“Either way, we were on the right way. We could have been married for a few years by now. But … things turned out differently. Now, we’re still in this situation where I am torn between Jing He and Jing Yi and the latter will have to put down his life for the former to return. All of this … I’m not sure what it will do to the relationship between Jing He and me, not to mention the fact that he will know my heritage.”
Qiu Ling sighed and closed his eyes, trying not to think of the worst. When he opened them again, some of the pain was still evident in his eyes. “I want him back. I want to get married, live together as a couple, and also finally have a child.
“I love having Jinde around, I am also happy with Leng Jin Yu being in my life, and I’m looking forward to having a sibling despite the huge age gap between us. But … I also want my own family with Jing He. And I have no idea how long I’ll have to wait to get that. Right now, I don’t think it’s anytime soon.
“It’s alright, really. Anyway, he’s young. I want him to have the time to get used to the thought before we finally think about it. But that’s just it: This isn’t about Jing He being comfortable, this is about all the other things wrong in our life. And I just wish … that things weren’t this complicated for once.
“I would love to be in Jinde and Leng Jin Yu’s situation right now where they are together and of the same mind and just … just go for it. I’m jealous of them having that.”